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arg - when you don't know what to do... — LiveJournal
do the next thing
I'm completely freaked out right now.

I've been called to active duty.

I report (I think) two weeks from Monday (they need to amend my orders).

They'll likely turn around and send me home, as I won't pass a PT test or the physical (I'm WAY overweight and out of shape).  But they might not.

Wolfie's being brilliantly supportive, as I knew he would be.  I'm abjectly afraid to leave him, because he's my rock.  He's my whole world, and I'm terrified of losing that, or worse, him losing me.

He doesn't get home for hours.  Somehow, I'm supposed to eat and do stuff between now and then.  I'm immobile with shock and anxiety.  And I lost my tips, too, so I don't even have any cash for a pizza.

Today was good.  Now today just sucks.

i feel: scared scared

60 trips or shoot the rapids
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kestrel127 From: kestrel127 Date: October 1st, 2004 02:18 pm (UTC) (base camp)
Holy crap!

::glares at the military for you::
tashabear From: tashabear Date: October 1st, 2004 02:28 pm (UTC) (base camp)
*smile* It's okay; I knew going in at 19 that this was a possibility, which was fine when I was young and free to do whatever I wanted with my life. It's just orders of magnitude harder now that I have Wolfie. And given the world situation, it's harder still.
kathrynt From: kathrynt Date: October 1st, 2004 02:23 pm (UTC) (base camp)
Oh, fuck.
tashabear From: tashabear Date: October 1st, 2004 02:25 pm (UTC) (base camp)
As always, sucinct and to the point.

I think, given the option, that I might end up resigning my commission. It's hard to contemplate, but it might come to it.
esmerel From: esmerel Date: October 1st, 2004 02:24 pm (UTC) (base camp)
Aie. I know many of us are going to be thinking positive thoughts for you.
tashabear From: tashabear Date: October 1st, 2004 02:30 pm (UTC) (base camp)
Thank you. I can use all the good thoughts I can get.
platys From: platys Date: October 1st, 2004 02:24 pm (UTC) (base camp)
Oh no! *worries*
tashabear From: tashabear Date: October 1st, 2004 02:31 pm (UTC) (base camp)
was1 From: was1 Date: October 1st, 2004 02:35 pm (UTC) (base camp)
Oh wow, I'd forgot you were in the reserves/guard. You guys will be in my thoughts. I hope everything will be okay. (*hug*)
tashabear From: tashabear Date: October 2nd, 2004 06:36 am (UTC) (base camp)
Everything will work out the way it's meant to be.
emmacrew From: emmacrew Date: October 1st, 2004 02:59 pm (UTC) (base camp)
Fuck fuck fuck.

Quick, somone needs to give you mono. My cousin is officially "undeployable" for 18 months because she got mono a month or two ago.
tashabear From: tashabear Date: October 1st, 2004 03:03 pm (UTC) (base camp)
I've had it already. Getting preggers isn't an option, either. I won't do that to a kid.
points From: points Date: October 1st, 2004 03:00 pm (UTC) (base camp)
If you all need anything, at all, please do not hestitate to call on me. *Many, many hugs*
tashabear From: tashabear Date: October 1st, 2004 03:05 pm (UTC) (base camp)
I will. Thanks.
hascouf From: hascouf Date: October 1st, 2004 03:12 pm (UTC) (base camp)

Good Luck with whatever you decide to do, and I'll deliver tomorrow.

tashabear From: tashabear Date: October 1st, 2004 03:40 pm (UTC) (base camp)
Deliver? Deliver what? I'm still going to Coronation...
mariora From: mariora Date: October 1st, 2004 03:26 pm (UTC) (base camp)
Oh no!! I hope you don't have to go overseas or be gone at all. *hugs*
skittl1321 From: skittl1321 Date: October 1st, 2004 03:38 pm (UTC) (base camp)
EEK! That's freaky. I don't really understand how it is that they can just call people back up when they have fulfilled their commitment.

Especially since they are turning so many people down because of their Fit to Fight initaitives.

Hope it all works out for you.
tashabear From: tashabear Date: October 1st, 2004 03:44 pm (UTC) (base camp)
They can do it to me partly because I'm still on the rolls, and partly because my training (transportation) is something they desperately need right now. We'll ignore the fact that I've forgotten a great deal of it and would benefit greatly from refresher training and going to the Officer Advanced Course.

They can turn down new recruits for being out of shape or whatever because they haven't already spent the money on their training. They've already trained me, so they want more return on their investment.
rani23 From: rani23 Date: October 1st, 2004 03:58 pm (UTC) (base camp)
GLAH. Crap.
tashabear From: tashabear Date: October 1st, 2004 08:03 pm (UTC) (base camp)
Darned close to my reaction. ;-)
From: ohyarn Date: October 1st, 2004 04:24 pm (UTC) (base camp)

Oh, my...

.... I hope that you can work something out that seems manageable.

I'll be thinking of you!
tashabear From: tashabear Date: October 1st, 2004 07:52 pm (UTC) (base camp)

Re: Oh, my...

Everything happens for a reason. My job is to figure out what lesson I have to learn from this and do the best job I can. I owe my fellow soldiers nothing less.
spunkywulf From: spunkywulf Date: October 1st, 2004 05:38 pm (UTC) (base camp)
Oh my goodness. I don't know what to say. I'm a little shocked and quite a bit frightened at this prospect. I worry for you and I worry for Wolfie. If you need support, or some sort of help, or just some sort of contact, email me and let me know, okay?...

*tries to hug from several miles away*
tashabear From: tashabear Date: October 1st, 2004 07:15 pm (UTC) (base camp)
My arms are too short, too, but thanks. I'll keep everyone posted.
profesor From: profesor Date: October 1st, 2004 05:53 pm (UTC) (base camp)
Damn, girl. You take care of yourself. *hug*
tashabear From: tashabear Date: October 1st, 2004 07:17 pm (UTC) (base camp)
Oh, definitely. I have reasons to, now. *hug*
collwen From: collwen Date: October 2nd, 2004 06:30 am (UTC) (base camp)
*hugs* It will work out.
60 trips or shoot the rapids
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