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teeter totter - when you don't know what to do...
do the next thing
tashabear
tashabear
teeter totter
Y'know those little balancing sculptures? The ones like with the gull that balances on one wing? I feel like that lately. Somehow I have managed to
  • commit to something every day of every weekend between now and the end of the month
  • get a job that has really fucked up my wrist
  • work myself into a state of insomnia again (with accompanying emotional instability)

It's that last one that bugs me. I feel exhausted all the time, and when I'm not exhausted, something hurts, or I feel sick. It means I can't do my sports, which makes me even more depressed. I don't want to go and do anything, especially not when it means I have to smile and be nice to people, and that means that I'm no fun for poor Wolfie to hang out with.

That's probably not true. But I feel like I'm a total drag for everybody, and a burden to my friends.

Welcome to the downward spiral of a clinical depressive. I'll probably snap out of it.

Sometime.

Whatever.

i feel: depressed depressed

2 trips or shoot the rapids
Comments
bellatrixx From: bellatrixx Date: September 13th, 2002 07:26 pm (UTC) (base camp)
*hugs* Cancel something. Anything, for at least a few of those days. 2 or 3, at the least. And then take a day for yourself to unwind. You sure sound like you need it.
tashabear From: tashabear Date: September 14th, 2002 04:37 pm (UTC) (base camp)

I wish I could. But one was the equestrian event we did today (more about that in a subsequent post), one is a bridal shower, then there's a housewarming party, an SCA demo where I get to sit around in garb and spin, and a wedding. I *could* cancel some, but they look to be fun, in truth. I was just really down, mostly about my wrist. I feel much better now; a day in the fresh air with my sweetie and my friends and horsies was just what I needed.
2 trips or shoot the rapids